Grrl Power – Dabbler’s Science Corner #3
The return of Dabbler’s science corner! It’s been… geeze, 10 years? Probably should have slipped a few more of those in there along the way.
I didn’t want to interrupt Peggy’s flashback, but I had a sudden time crunch, and it was this or switch to some kind of stick figure art for the flashback, which… has its merits, cause I could attribute the poor art to Peggy’s memory of the events being fuzzy. But this seemed like a better choice than compromising the art for a relatively serious moment in the comic.
I don’t normally share a lot of personal drama here in the comic posts, because you guys mostly come here for entertainment, and speaking personally, it bugs me when I’m looking for some light hearted laughs, but the author uses the posts as an agony aunt or therapy sessions. If it actually helps them deal with whatever they’re going through, then, you know, good for them, but it is incongruous with the medium of “funny pages.”
In this case, I think it’s important you guys understand what my preoccupation is, because I don’t like paring down the art every time I hit some kind of personal speedbump. Well, the short version is, my father passed away. If you’ve ever been through such a thing as an adult, then you know that a huge amount of your time is suddenly spoken for. Emotionally, I’m doing okay. Partially I think it’s because I’ve been prepared for some bad news about my mom for about three years, ever since she started having issues. I never really considered that he would go first, even though he was 5 years older than her, and it’s this kind of slow moving shock to have this constant in my life suddenly gone. It also leaves me and my sister with some decisions to make, as my mom can’t live on her own at this point, and now we’ve got this “large enough to host the whole family during the holidays” house with 82 years of stuff in it to deal with. Well, the house is paid off, and most of the contents can be dealt with via an estate sale, but there are some things that have emotional value, like the nice dining table we always used for holiday dinners. Unfortunately, neither me nor my sister have a lot of room for a huge table or the matching buffet table, (which is something I never once considered buying for my own home, but I kind of don’t want to get rid of my parents’ one) but we’ll figure it out.
On a lighter note, my Dad was organized. Like, Leslie Knope levels of organized. He left nine 3-ring binders with “Here’s what you do if me or me and your mom die” instructions. They’ve got his will, his lawyer, financial manager, lists of personal contacts, a “here’s a sample obituary,” thumb drives with obituary photos, other thumb drives with photos for a slideshow during the memorial, life insurance information, burial instructions, it’s… a lot. And honestly it might be evidence that he was a little bored with retirement. But thank god he had all this stuff laid out because otherwise I’d be googling “what to do when your dad dies.” Even with this “death by the numbers” guide he laid out, the first week felt like juggling headless chickens and chasing spinning plates.
I know some people will suggest that it’d be okay to take a week or two off from the comic if I really need to, and while people who are used to having Grrl Power as part of their Monday/Thursday routine, yeah, that’d probably be okay. But I know there are a lot of casual lurkers who might slowly start to bleed off if I start missing posts, so the Science Corner is my solution. The flat colors and simple backgrounds help a lot, though weirdly, the quasi-chibi art doesn’t save me a whole lot of time, because I’m so unused to drawing it, that I have to keep going back and squishing proportions and intentionally minimizing detail.
I’m saving “miss a few weeks of the comic” for when I get into a car wreck and am literally in a coma. Though following my dad’s example, I should buy some 3-ring binders and detail how to post a “Hey, this is DaveB’s wife, he’s in a coma so just chill out for a bit.” Also, I should probably get a will made. Yeah.
So that’s where I’m at. I’m doing alright, but I’m bummed that I’m missing my bi-weekly Pathfinder game for the next month or two. You guys remember Fray, my monk? Yeah, I think I broke something… actually this post is long enough, I’ll post about Pathfinder foibles under the next page. Until then, enjoy!
(Oh, and I don’t have a new vote incentive this month. There just wasn’t time to work on it, sorry. I might re-link some of the old ones for this month or something starting with the next page.)
The new vote incentive is up!
Dabbler went somewhere tropical, in a very small bikini. As you might guess, it doesn’t stay on for long, which of course, you can see over at Patreon. Also she has an incident with “lotion,” and there’s a bonus comic page as well.
Double res version will be posted over at Patreon. Feel free to contribute as much as you like
SNL, Moo Deng: “Hose!”
I can’t imagine the tough time and pain you’re going through, but please know you are not alone.
Condolences for your dad. And you are right most of us are more than happy for you to take the time. Besides I actually enjoy Dabblers Science corner, its a moment where you can lore dump about things that dont come up organically in the story.
Condolences, man. No worries on needing to take time, I’ve seen my dad and uncle have to take care of my late grand-uncle’s stuff and it took literal years to go through it all.
“cream pies”?
This being Dabbler, that’s probably going to require more than a shower to feel clean afterwards.
Innuendo don’t always have to lead to actual action even when succubi are involved.
But the chance is disturbingly high that it does…
Only the teacher is allowed to be sassy.
And yes, flat colors and no background is a good compromise. In fact it’s nice to see a different style now and then.
Ah yes… The difference between a car mechanic who knows why the car isn’t working and puts down the list of parts that need to be repaired or even replaced knowing that the current problem is simply a symptom of various other problems…
And yet you get that one person who asks “Can’t you just replace the spark plugs? I saw that work on TV before.”
Dazzler knows magic and how complicated and difficult it can be. The humans… Mostly know it as the equivalent of TV show hacking powers where hitting control, alt, shift will allow them to hack the weather satellite to cause snow to fall in Hawaii.
Car wreck to coma is a low odds event. But everyone has 2 parents, and the age difference makes it more likely that kids will lose them. Take the week off. We’ll only expect this excuse to work 1 more time, so its all good.
Life seems plenty tough enough, and having to pick up the pieces of a parent’s life sounds incredibly challenging. Remember your self care.
First, fully on board with taking time off for this. Anyone who complains can just piss off. That said, most artists use their work to help process loss, so… it’s a trade off.
As for it only happening twice, not exactly…. If you’re married, you effectively have 2 sets of parents (4 total). And if your parents have been divorced, then it can go to 4 just for you (more for spouse), though once you get to that many you also probably have more people to help with the details.
My wife’s parents divorced and re-married, so she has 4 total. Her biological mom died several years ago (literally in my wife’s arms in the hospital), and I had to arrange lots of the details for her because she was too traumatized and her step-dad was in a nursing home. We had taken the time to deal with their house several years back when the moved to an assisted living facility, but packing up her room was still stressful for her. It was less stressful when her step-dad died because she had multiple additional step-siblings (his biological children) to help.
My dad died almost exactly a year ago, but he had been mentally and physically deteriorating for years. So we were somewhat prepared and my mom handled all the details with emotional support from my brother and I. When my mom passes, though… she’s been the head of the family for years and that will be a serious blow. I’ll probably have to take off for weeks and temporarily move back home (or at least switch to remote-part-time).
Sorry for the passing of your father, DaveB. Lost my pop in 2017 and it took a while for it really hit home. I hope you and your family are doing well. A few days/weeks/whatever of Dabbler Dabbling is a welcome change given your situation; take whatever time you need.
Posting a comment for the 1st time simply to give my condolences. Been there done that 2 years ago. It hits you at odd times…most of the time you can truck along but then a little thing brings the feels up to the surface ( I had a silly one when I went grocery shopping and passed the specific loaf of bread she insisted on me getting for her).
My thoughts are with you and yours
I’m so sorry for your loss, Dave. I lost my Mom about 3-years ago, I know how much it hurts.
You can be prepared for it coming, but it never truly softens the blow.
Only thing I can provide to you for advice is, don’t be afraid to lean on your family & your friends. Grieve your own way on your own time, but don’t be afraid to let them be a shoulder for you.
Don’t worry about the comic. We all know grief & loss, we’ll understand if you need a week or 6 to deal. & we’ll all be waiting for you when-&-if you’re ready to return.
Do nut fight over the donuts.
Re-using old incentives is probably the best call. I’m sure there are plenty who missed some of the early ones and its not like those who have stayed consistent with the comic for long enough to have those old ones aren’t likely fans who would vote anyway.
I guess a binder solution on what to do in the event of a disaster that puts you out of commission for a while might simply be to have a few Dabbler’s corners ready to go with unimportant information or detail and mostly jokes that could be put in at any point. Otherwise I’m willing to bet you know some artists who would be more than willing to do some guest art and have their names and possibly own art pages or webcomics mentioned.
Hope you, your sister and mom make it through this tough time though.
Agreed, I second most of the ideas in this post. It helps keep the comic updated, and some people; me included, use this comic and a few others to help unwind after similar hectic family or life issues.
We enjoy your work and hope the best for you.
As one of the lurkers you reffered to.
Whilst i dont wanna speak for all of us, we would probly be fine i you anmounce you need a break. We’d just check back every few months or so and cath up when able. I dont believe we’d reach page 1300 +- without becomming able to remember your existence.
But if you feel you can and want to, or just cant let your whole life become about this for a month…. We will keep reading.
My lurking condolences and i hope you find out something for the table.
Sad for your loss, condolences. My Dad passed years ago but we lost Mom a bare year ago, I know the hurt. You have a lot on your plate emotionally and in taking care of everything that goes along with the funeral and inheritance stuff. You are wise in rearranging your art but not because you’d lose any of your fans, but keeping your hand in the game supplies a bit of normalcy in a tough emotional time. I don’t think any of your followers would drop off if you did decide to take some time off. Anyway , thoughts and prayers, take care, we’re all behind you in this.
At least he had a full life. I lost my father when he was 55 and there isn’t a fixed formula to deal with it. Seems like your father left you a last gift because dealing with all the bullsh*t that comes after someone leaves this life… it’s bothersome at the least.
Keeping busy helps for a while but sooner or later the emotional train it’s gonna reach you.
Good luck and best wishes from here.
I just got back from my grandfather’s funeral, so I’ve actually had a lot of the same thoughts. Will planning, communication to the various groups I’m a part of, etc. My condolences to you and your family, and best of luck with figuring everything out.
Condolences dave. I remember when my dad passed away and I can relate to the pain and emptiness it leaves you with. I won’t tell you to take a break or anything and I respect whatever you do but I still want you to know you have a good community here. We support you.
Condolences and big hugs, Dave. Take all the time you need.
My condolences about your dad. I remember when mine passed suddenly and I’m glad to hear you seem to be handling it well enough.
So sorry for your loss.
It’s always challenging when someone close passes away.
Take whatever time you need. We’re not going anywhere. :)
Condolences Dave…I lost my Dad over 5 years ago…he left us nothing to go by…a really outdated will…no notes…no hints…nada…He made me and my sister co-executors of his estate…thankfully the house was paid off…but yeah…it’s not an easy thing to cope with up front…and there’s gonna be days when you just flat out miss the guy…just know…we’re all here for you…do what you need to do for yourself and your family…that’s whats important
Thinking of you and your family. May your dad’s memory be a blessing. Xoxoxox
Condolences and hang tough. Just take it one day at a time. For me it was I guess 5 years ago now and that first year where you have all those habits that your loved one was a part of is the hardest.
My condolences and sympathies, Dave. I lost my parents 3 and 4 years ago. My mom was completely out of the blue, even though she was 90, my dad was expected a year later.
One word of advice regarding the “stages of grief”. The person who came up with that did not intend it as a progression to go through step by step in sequence, it was more of a ‘these are what you may experience’, you may not experience them all, and you may go back and revisit some. So be good to yourself and take it easy.
My best to you and yours, and watch out for anniversary dates, like birthdays and wedding anniversaries.
Dave, I’ve never commented here, just came to offer condolences. I’ve been there, too. You’ll get through it, or you can leave the junk for your survivors to deal with. Like my grandmother, and then my dad, did.
Your dad’s preparations are a blessing. My dad had his financial affairs in order, and he appointed my niece (by far the best organized of his survivors) to be his executor. It was a great help.
Give yourself space and time to mourn and work it through. And thanks for all the years of great comics.
Very sorry for your loss. My dad passed away almost two years ago. Hope your mom is okay and that things for her transition will go smoothly.
I could do with some Guest comics, I’ve been dying to see more of space Hitler and Squirrel Sydney.
My condolences for your loss. I’m glad your dad left instructions like he did. Sounds like it simplified the process, even if it doesn’t simplify other things. Take time away from the comic if you need; we’ll still be here.
I hope I’m not poking my nose in where it doesn’t go, but hearing you talk about both your mom’s needs and the table makes me wonder how far away from you and/or your sister your parents lived, since one solution about the table space issue and caring for your mom would be to have one of you move your family into their home (mom willing), but you’d know more about the logistics of that than we do. So long as there was space, you wouldn’t have to rush about going through dad’s belongings, much less mom’s belongings in preparation for moving her. Granted, you’ve already moved relatively recently, but I know if I had the option to move into a house that was already paid for, thus freeing up whatever the rent/mortgage payment was, it would be a tempting prospect.
I lost both my parents in 2011, so I know what you are going through. No matter how well you think you are prepared for it, you really aren’t. Do what you have to do. We will understand.
I have to say, I do appreciate your dedication to the schedule and it has not gone unnoticed. I’ve known a few other webcomics that updated as regularly as Grrlpower does, while the vast majority of them simply don’t have a schedule or do have a “schedule” but then it seems to slip practically every other week.
I just love that Dr. Viking Guy (Master Healer) gets to keep wearing his helmet and braided beard into the operating room.
It’s magic, so it’s probably fine, but it’s hilarious thinking of him in the hospital next to the other doctors, axe in hand in the hospital doing a shift
The magical healing axe must be combined with the magical healing helmet and the magical healing beard for the best efficency.
My condolences. It’s really not fun for a zillion reasons, and one of those is the realization of how unprepared you feel to die yourself.
As far as sentimental stuff you can’t keep goes, sometimes it helps to take a few good photos to keep the memories without the physical object. You can even write about the object if there’s something about it you can’t capture in a picture, like a smell or the way light reflects off it. Then let the object go on to someone new who will appreciate it, or let it “retire” and rest. Sometimes it helps if someone else throws it away when you aren’t looking. You know it’s gone, but you weren’t the one to toss it; it’s a weird coping mechanism, but we’re a weird species.
*HUGS!* You and your family have my deepest condolences. *HUGS*
Dave, I’m sorry for your loss. Clearly your Dad was a thoughtful person, and the thoughtfulness flowed from love.
My sympathies. Losing any family member is a shock, even if you knew it was coming. My mom died last August at age 85 and this still startles me. My long-term memory has not integrated this, but I think this is part of being human.
I hope you don’t miss too many Pathfinder games before things settle back to more-or-less normal.
How can you fusillade cream pies? I know she’s a succubus, but surely she can’t have *that* many…”firearms” discharge inside her at once. It’s more of a salvo if they go off one after the other.
A lightly modified M270 MLRS?
Mind you, I’m assuming actual cream pies, the ones you bake in an oven. It would fit with the bottle of seltzer (I think) she conjured and is using in the last panel.
rotating pie thrower + Abundant Ammunition spell.
My condolences on your loss. I will be going to a memorial for a close family member in the near future, so these kinds of things were already on my mind. Wish I had something useful to say. I do endorse others’ comments on remembering self care.
On the comic itself… panel 5 (maybe 5 and 6? depends on how you count), with the two versions of the axe guy? AMAZING. Thank you for that.
Been there as both my parents died within a couple of years of each other, so first off condolences and cyber hugs for you and your sibs (if you want/need hugs!). could you have Syd do a flashback of D&D gaming and run a couple of the early posts again?
I’m almost afraid to ask what Dabbler’s idea of a “fusillade of cream pies” is.
possibly a much hornier version of the 7 Dwarves…. with cream pies…yes..