Grrl Power #1271 – Kung Fulcrum
Obviously Jabber takes the shape of her body and center of gravity into account when doing all her Hi-Keebas, but even though her chest has more weight than Sydney’s, it’s not like she’s swinging around a pair of kettlebells. You could do a lot of unexpected flippy attacks if you were holding onto something that acted as a significant counterweight, like a (humongous fantasy) maul or a 40 lb dumbbell. Actual historical mauls weren’t that much heavier than a sledgehammer, so they’d be bad for spirographing kung fu moves.
Now a tail… that could have some heft to it. Not a cat tail or a kitsune tail, but a nice plump lizard tail. Or better yet, an ankylosaurus tail, with that built in kettlebell. Granted, that sort of tail wouldn’t be prehensile beyond waving back and forth. Lapha’s tail is prehensile. She’s still learning to use it for things other than getting it caught in doors and knocking stuff off of shelves, but it’s not really chonky enough to significantly shift her fulcrum if she’s doing spinny kicks. Once she learns to grab stuff with her tail reliably, it will open up a whole new move set for her when she brawls.
I’ve got some book recommendations for you guys.
I recently finished this one, it’s called Invading the System: Systema Delenda Est. I really liked it, probably because it’s a lot different than my usual fare. It’s technically an Isekai book, but unlike most Hero From Another World books, the main character doesn’t get hit by a truck and wake up in a fantasy world. He goes there on purpose. In the form of a ten-ton kaiju. So, while I like LitRPGs in theory, there’s a lot about the genre I don’t like. I’ve said it before, but I can’t do any video game books. There’s just no stakes, unless the story is really about affecting something in the real world somehow. The other branch of LitRPG I don’t care for is the System Apocalypse subgenre, where “The System” comes to Earth, technology stops working, millions or billions die, and people have to rank up or die. I don’t know why, but that subgenre bugs me. Well, the main character in Invading the System agrees with me, because in the book, The System came to an Earth rather far in our future, an Earth where cybernetics were prevalent, intra-system space travel was a thing, and people could become post-biological, i.e. upload their consciousnesses into a mainframe or a bio-weapon. And when The System hit Earth, technology stopped working and like 10 billion people died instantly. But humanity discovered that their bio-weapon organic tech still worked, and The System was only on Earth. Its influence didn’t even extend to the moon. So they orbital dropped Kaiju soldiers onto the planet and destroyed all the anchors (dungeons, etc) needed for The System to stay there, basically eradicating it from the planet. But they don’t know why it came there or how to prevent it from coming back, so, the book opens with the main character going to another world with an established System, intent on purging that world, in the opening salvo intended to beat The System back all across the galaxy and eradicate it from existence. Obviously, there will be enormously powerful beings with a vested interest in maintaining the status quo, so, long road ahead. As I said, I really enjoyed this book, partially because the main character was extremely non-human. I won’t spoil anything, but let’s just say the ten-ton kaiju form he arrives in is, uh… his starting point.
Okay, I know I just said I don’t like books that take place in video games, but, this one is an exception because it’s told from the point of view of an NPC. An NPC who is glitched past an early story-driven character-death-to-motivate-the-hero moment and follows the hero through the remainder of the quest. I thought it was really funny because the player… plays like someone playing a game. Like, he steals everything that isn’t nailed down, and continually attempts to break stuff in the game. The whole time, the NPC is playing it totally straight and trying to rationalize the hero’s behavior. The audiobook is especially good because while the NPC is giving herself a lecture about her destiny and duty to aid the hero’s quest, you can hear him in the background going “Hup! Hyup! Hut!” cause he’s jumping on tables and mumbling about trying to fit a broom into his inventory and stuff like that. There’s also a ton of video game trope references which I found amusing. Anyway, it’s cute and funny and there’s a little more to the story than just goofy winks to the reader, but I won’t spoil any of that stuff. Oh, right, the book is called Prophecy Approved Companion.
I think I’ve recommended this one before, but no harm in plugging it again. It’s called Mark of the Fool. Basically, the Big Bad returns on a cycle, but the people are defended by the chosen ones, each given a blessing to become a mighty mighty. The Champion, the Sage, etc. The main character, as you might guess, receives the Mark of the Fool, which means he can’t attack anyone. He can’t punch someone, he can’t throw a rock at them, he can’t cast a fireball spell at someone. The mark does allow him to learn any non-combat skill at an accelerated rate, but historically, The Fool’s contribution to beating back the Big Bad is to die early on, thus uniting the remaining heroes in vengeance. Unsurprisingly, the main character isn’t really excited at this prospect and ducks out, heading instead to wizard school. And it turns out that being The Fool might not be the worst thing in the world if you’re not immediately thrown against the slavering hordes of the Big Bad where you become a massive combat liability for the other heroes.
And here’s a manga that I bought like 3 years ago and then forgot I had for some reason. Then I started reading it and bought the rest of the series right away. It’s called A Witch’s Printing Office, and it’s about a girl who gets isekai’d to another world, and her solution for getting back is to basically invent Comic-Market, but for magic. The idea being to bring all the mages together to swap and sell spells and tomes, which will allow her to browse through their offerings looking for a Teleport to Another World spell. It’s 95% humor, with stuff like knights of the realm being used to form shield walls to keep attendees in lines and the MC making deals with demons and dragons to keep expanding the spell offerings, and the while she’s running a printing shop that is hugely overwhelmed with work. And the art is very nice to boot. Actually it’s part of the reason I’ve been trying some new stuff with the comic recently. Honestly, drawing a comic is time consuming and I don’t get a lot of comic reading time. Books I can do if there’s an audiobook, but you can’t really multitask when reading comics, and it’s something I need to set aside more time for.
The new vote incentive is up!
Oh no! Superheroines in a deathtrap! Well… a tickle trap. Okay, not trapped, trapped, but… look, three of the girls are getting tickled. Actually, in a way, seven girls are getting tickled since the other four Harems will feel this as well, but technically it’s only the three shown in the picture since Harem insists there’s only one of her – it’s just confusing since she can be in 5 places at once.
As you can probably imagine, Patreon shows what happens if they laugh, and also has a comic revealing who is behind this nefarious situation.
Double res version will be posted over at Patreon. Feel free to contribute as much as you like.
“Introducing the iTit! The only musical mammary implant on the market. Made for women who would rather have you listen to them than stare.”
“Visit your local Apple store today for speaker size selection and “Beat” some sense into your partner!”
“Don’t forget our exclusive radio station A-iTit. Playing the breast- I mean best tunes in town!”
I suppose using small leds to turn the bra into a screen is passé. after all, who watches the boob tube anymore?
Actually according to an old master I had just over 45 years ago when I was 6 or 7 years old the size of the chest can have a significant effect on counter balance in martial arts movement. Keep in mind this was from the mouth of a man that could do a leaping spinning kick some 25 feet across a room and snap a board in half without really seaming to put any effort into it.
I could snap a board in half in HEMA without really seaming tu put any effort into it ,with a Dane axe …
And hema is acronym of historical european martial arts
I’m not a master , but unarmed martial arts are in many case practically useless against :
1) An armed assaillant who had any practical training in melee combat … It’s apply also to a real stun gun.
2) A self defense tear gas and pepper spray, if they reach eyes.
3) Any handgun over 3 m it is a death or injury sentence if the adversary had any training in firearms.
Those are all true, or at least close enough, but defeating someone with a handgun 3m away isn’t the goal of learning martial arts. If someone with a handgun, or knife, or any other weapon demands your wallet, you give them your wallet. Chances are way too high that the assailant is desperate, crazy, and/or high enough to kill you without thinking. And since most normal people will hesitate to perform an act that could cause major harm, waiting until they are absolutely sure the assailant actually means to do harm vs. someone who will back down if they meet resistance, it’s too late you’re already shot or stabbed.
The goal of martial arts is to help with personal fitness and agility, confidence, and help you remain calm in a fight. To hurt the a basic bully enough such that bothering you isn’t worth their time. They can still beat you with a knife or gun, but that would draw the attention of the police and it would be easier to bother someone else. Or to help give you a few seconds of surprise so you can get away.
If you are female with “self defense” training, know that 75% of males are bigger and much stronger than you and can put you on the ground without half trying. This isn’t sexist, just basic biology and a body full of natural testosterone starting with puberty. Plus the type of man who would assault a woman has probably been fighting with friends and others his whole life so is equally trained with martial arts. The best defense is distance and the attention of others. Punch the drunk would-be-rapist in the throat, then run and/or scream. If you stay to fight he will beat you.
“Those are all true, or at least close enough, but defeating someone with a handgun 3m away isn’t the goal of learning martial arts. If someone with a handgun, or knife, or any other weapon demands your wallet, you give them your wallet. ”
Master Ken disagrees!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=daHQTH5TmAc
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=06HgdDdw3WY
And as always, restomp that groin. Dosh!
Almost forgot this one:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5uO0wsEUBN0
I feel like a disclaimer might be needed. though the one in the video description isn’t bad.
buy his book.
Another data point: though badly out of practice, I did years of martial arts training. And fenced (foil and epee’) and did some sword-and-board training (albeit SCA, not HEMA).
I had a coworker who was far more skilled at competition karate than I ever was, but had little real-world experience. He was absolutely certain that a skilled martial artist could counter most hand held weapons, and was offended when I pointed out that historically, bare-handed martial arts were in large part a reaction to a disarmed populace. So I suggested a little test – I’d bring in a foil, and we’d see if I could stop him – defined as “can I touch your chest with the tip of my foil while avoiding your attack”.
I was a very low-level collegiate fencer. He was a 1st Dan black belt. And we established that unless we started at arms-reach level, I could ALWAYS execute a heart thrust before he got close enough to touch me.
Knives are different – you’re already in arms-reach level. But axes, swords, clubs … if you have any training with them at all you’ve got a significant advantage vs the bare-hands fighter.
Now, if it starts with a surprise attack while the weapon is sheathed or holstered … yes, the martial artist has a significant advantage if he’s within roughly 20 feet and can land a disabling attack. Look up “Tueller dril” online – more than half the time, an attacker armed with a knife starting at that distance can successfully stab a defender with a holstered pistol. But if you’re starting with both fighters alert and ready, assuming similar skill levels the armed fighter is probably going to win.
I am a master in math fu
I finished with very high grade in a black belt written course.(*)
I can tell you real surprise really is a killer. It gives you a lot of extra time to get rid of the weapons advantage the oppsing party has.
(*) it is an advanced course after the written course “running 101”
Ah, my own preferred martial art is Rincewind Style Exitsu. Don’t worry about where you are running to, that will naturally take care of itself. Running away is much more important and if a new danger appears, well, you’re already running so just change direction.
1. We see our characters in the midst of a mundane activity
2. Suddenly, they are confronted with a Plot. A mission has come up, or bad guys have done something unexpected.
3. Sydney asks questions–very insightful, meaningful questions. Plot actions becomes interspersed with exposition.
4. Action scenes become interspersed with the plot. Exposition slows to a trickle.
5. The villain is defeated but not entirely. Some of them got away, or they accomplished an arcane goal.
6. The event is discussed and plans are made going forward. Flip a coin to see if Desu is there.
7. goto 1.
This isn’t a criticism, most longform writing is formulaic and this works very well. More wiggle room than a cop-procedural but with all the reliable plot-bones.
I do like Ju-tits-su. you could market that name.
somebody once described what the Sailor scouts did in the live action version as Ballet-Fu
I do hope we get to see the Math sparing.
It’s his only weakness and she’s going to milk it for all she’s worth!
Karen Price. Full bra and gymnastics. Full stop.